And inspiring TED talk show was the first "signal" that reminds me that "30 is not the new 20". (See ink here http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vhhgI4tSMwc) It has taught me about how starkly different the life of 20's is from that of 30's. It spurred me to change myself for better but at that point of time I still didn't know how to start managing my bad attitudes or pessimistic emotion. However, the talk did help me to focus on things that are important to me and reduce negative thoughts.
If you think that today I have already figured out a golden rule to live meaningfully and happily, then you are wrong. I still do not have a clear idea how to but I dare say that I am not as pessimistic as I was last year. I would had credited this good change of thought to my busy lab work and studies but not this time. This time I would like to credit myself for the small but important change. In the last semester, I consciously remind myself to appreciate what I have and to search for what I HAVE TO do. And after I knew what had to be done, I do it without thinking about "what if it didn't end up well" but only focusing on "how to make it better and how to do it faster without sacrificing the quality". And the results were way beyond what I expected it to be. It was way way better than what I expected or what I wanted. This little change in mindset really has a huge positive impact in my final year of study and I know that I still have many more rooms of improvement.
I am thankful that on this Christmas night, I came across some passages that encouraged me to adjust my bad tempered and negative mindset. The excerpt below is the reason why I write tonight:
"You only create something you want, you can't banish something you don't want- it would have leave a vacuum that you would need to fill, so best you fill it first and the undesirable aspects of your life will fall away."
And there was this suggestion that i start cultivating the gratitude attitude as a first step towards success and happiness in life. I know this is a good idea especially for someone who always sees the bad before the good in things and people. And there is no harm crediting each day I live through to good things that happen, or blessings in disguise. If it can eventually banish my old way of thinking, it is more than worthy giving just a few minutes of my 24 hour writing down at least 3 good things that happen on everyday. I know this would force and train me to think positively. Doing something that would help my personal development is always better than clinging on to those unhappy occasions in my life.
So here I begin, some of the things that I an grateful for today:
- I am glad I read those passages that reminds me to stay positive so that I can be more productive and happy.
- Though this sounds silly, but I actually learnt some valuable lessons from this Chinese costume drama that I am rushing to finish all episodes: TRUST is the most important asset between a couple. Also, a wife/ girlfriend should always think for her husband/boyfriend and not making his life at home hard after he endures hardship at his workplace.
- I am thankful for my mum who tries to cook every dish that I mentioned before I head back to Singapore soon, and for my dad who brought us to the dam for a walk and I got to enjoy a very scenic view that is rare to be seen in a busy schedule.
I kept all my old, whinny posts under draft. And I would reread them in future, hopefully with a cheerful soul, to see how silly I was wasting my life replaying all the unhappy events in my head =) I know that "it's all in your head" and I want to be the master of my thoughts and emotions, not the other way round.
Well, I really am no longer a kid and I have to start being a good woman for my future husband, haha
